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In fourth grade, my teacher had a banner with the oft-quoted Oscar Wilde encouragement to be ourselves.
Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.
Despite commonly being told to be ourselves, I don’t think many of us listen. And maybe for good reason.
To be oneself is to be vulnerable. To be vulnerable is to risk expulsion from our in-groups. It’s a delicate line to balance on.
As much as I would love to “simply not give a fuck,” I don’t really think that’s a practical lesson for having an impact. We are social animals, and we accomplish far more by working together than by isolating ourselves.
And yet, less than a year into college, I can’t help but wonder — am I where I am because this is where I belong or because this is what I was told to do?
In a podcast episode with one my friends from college, I asked her what advice she would give to her high school self. She was hesitant, arguing that if she gave advice to her former self, she may not end up where she is, today.
I proposed an alternative solution. What if one was radically themselves? What if they did what they wanted to do, followed their own purpose not that of someone else? Wouldn’t they end up where they are supposed to be?
